Where are you? Hiding for so long. I may die in the streets, crawl into a ditch. I may starve, unknown, forgotten. Where are the promises given so religiously, in the bars and cafes, on someones death bed? Is there no time to feel my pain, to see the beauty i see? Will you turn away forever? Is there not a drop of blood left waiting?
I have accepted my fate. My words caress the images that had shone their light upon me. In times of gloom and solemn atmosphere shades of gray lay their magic hues across my eyes, the lens of my camera, the heart of my mind. I thank you for that. I walked a whole life time thru the ruins of crashing light and soft form to persuade you to shine your light upon me. I asked quietly. I am a photographer. I am a writer. I photograph you, i write about you. You have been my only true friend as i walk these streets and trails and watch time die at every glance. You are my love, your tender neck long as the day is long, your velvet lips rouge as the night is blind. You have been everything to me. My life has been your life.
Where are you, success, i am dying. Life is coming to an end and you have not performed. The stage is set, the curtain is up, the audience is waiting, the lights are tempting themselves to dance. The floor is bare. Where are you my muse, my sacred freind, my true love?
I need you. I need your freedom. I need the touch of your spirit to be real. I can't live with out you; but you make it so hard, sometimes; so shy, so quiet when you could expose me to the world, get what i deserve. I accept my fate, whatever it may be. I see, i see, i am seeing.

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(added thoughts…. a surreal relationship with sweet Sweet Marie)